In Which Our Heroine Ponders Pride, Progress And All That Entails

It’s LGBTQIA+ Pride Month! That means it’s time for me to ramble a little bit, as well as repair yet another oversight.

I came out as bisexual in 2020 – at least, I did to my friends, some of my family, and most of my social media at the time. But I didn’t do that here, so I am now. So, hi, I’m bi. It’s rather wild and wonderful to discover (or realize) that about one’s self in one’s mid-40s, but hey. Better late than never, right?

To be fair, being bi doesn’t really change anything about my life – at least, not to the outside world. I’m still happily married to a wonderful man, and I don’t feel the urge to be with anyone else. My family is supportive, even if my childhood church isn’t. In general, for me, coming out was pretty low-risk, and it’s turned out really well! I’m learning all kinds of things about myself. I’m growing.

I realize (oh do I ever) that I’m one of the lucky ones. It’s easy for me, relatively speaking. I live in a very liberal state. And if I didn’t, if I wanted to, I could take off my shiny bracelet and pass as completely straight. After all, I thought I was straight for most of my life.

But I refuse to take off that bracelet. I have that luxury, too. I am very unlikely to be attacked in any way for being myself. The worst I risk is a disapproving look. But keeping that flag flying will hopefully help other people to be able to do the same.

I still believe that Love will win in the end. I believe that progress is being made, even though that progress may feel like it’s under constant threat. I also believe that we all have to work together to make that happen.

I don’t mean that in a “happy shiny people holding hands” kind of way. I don’t mean that everything will be perfect, ever. Because it won’t, because we’re all human, and humans are messy and complicated and difficult.

But things can be better, and every one of us can help make it so.

Progress is what we can hope for, not perfection. Perfection means there’s no more growing to do. And while that sounds like a useless platitude, I don’t think it is.

Supporting a friend is progress. Writing to your Congressperson, whether they listen or not, is progress (if you’re in the USA). Reaching out and lifting others up wherever you can is progress. Acknowledging your own needs and resting is also progress, as is allowing others to lift you up.

Please be especially kind to yourself and others this month, friends. There’s so much more to come – both Pride and Progress.