You Don’t Have To Do That – At Least, Not That Way

In Which Our Heroine Reflects On Who Is Truly The Boss Of Her

Like many people with ADHD, I struggle with staying organized. I need routines and systems, and I feel (or have felt) that I needed to follow those specific systems To The Letter if they were going to be effective. I thought that, once I found the right System, all I would need is Discipline and Willpower. And then, everything would fall into place and be perfect forever. I just needed to Follow The Rules.

I’ve discovered that my brain doesn’t work that way. I need multiple tools and, sometimes, a tool that worked really well for me in the past doesn’t work for me now. I’ve started to realize that Rigidity and Complete Commitment to a System are actually counterproductive, which feels weird to me. Shouldn’t an easily-distracted person work better with a Strict Structure?

I’ve had these expectations of myself that I thought were coming from outside/society/friends and family. Actually, most of those expectations came from inside myself. I wanted to do things The Right Way – i.e. the way that looked like it worked for other people.

Then, I discovered How To ADHD while I was reading up on Basic Bullet Journals. (That’s a YouTube link there, and it’ll take you to the channel.) It was unbelievably helpful in helping me realize that It’s Good and Healthy for me to be Flexible. There’s no shame in my brain working differently, and it’s better to work with my brain than against it.

This feels obvious, no? But sometimes, human brains block the obvious because of the Rules. The Rules say that there’s One Right Way To Do Things. It took a bit for me to realize that there are other options, and that it’s OK to explore and figure out what works for me. Flexibility and Reflection are the keys. As long as I accomplish my goals, why should it matter to anyone else how I do that?

Well, maybe it might matter if How I Do That would also help you. So here’s a very quick summary of what’s in my Toolbox:

Right now, my Tools are:

• B6 Slim Notebook & Pen (as a modified Bullet Journal, because Paper and Pen help me focus and it’s easier to brain dump this way)
• Trello (my secondary brain app where all of my Bullet Journal Collections and Trackers live)
• Google Calendar (so I don’t forget appointments)
• Finch (my self care app that makes me happy and reminds me to do important things like Stretching and Breathing Exercises)

If you’d like to know more about any of the things I mentioned above, leave a comment and I’ll tell you more about how I use them. But remember – find what works for you! You’re the Boss of You! You get to make the Rules!

In conclusion, check out my latest Finished Object:

This is the Astronomy KAL from Gauge Dye Works. The idea was that we got to knit one stripe per day of February, and each non-grey stripe represents some sort of astronomical phenomenon. It was really fun, and I’d like to do another one.

But I finished it yesterday. Because I make the Rules.